October 18, 1998, I was 33 years old.

On a sunny day in autumn, early in the afternoon, I rode my bike home from a party where I had stayed over. I was driving on a priority road, not far from my home, when unexpectedly the car that was waiting suddenly leaped forward onto the main road. I did see the driver looking at me (or so I thought). Completely caught by surprise and without any chance to react, let alone brake, I crashed into the car. During that split second I thought: goodbye world, this is it, I die today. The sound of the impact was unforgettable, and then it was silent. It is amazing how many thoughts you can have in such a short moment.

After the crash, the driver stayed at the scene for a short moment, he looked at me and then drove off. Fortunately I ripped off most of the front of the car, including his license plate, so he could be tracked down by the police quickly.

I later learned from his family that he was 72 years old and that he was suffering from aphasia. The authorities had decided earlier that his condition affected his driving skills so much that he could cause dangerous situations in traffic and therefore his license had been revoked. Nevertheless, he did not stop driving his car and his family even took his car keys away from him to prevent him from driving. The man, however, had enough money and had immediately bought a new Mercedes.

I remember the woman who sat down beside me, putting a blanket over me and gently whispering that the ambulance was on its way. What a warm human being. How beautiful can people react when you really need help. Unfortunately, I was not able to find out who she was. I just wanted to thank her. I hope she realizes how much positive impact she had on me that day.

Sometimes accidents happen because you’re careless, you can blame yourself and thus delude yourself that you have things in your own hand: “it will not happen to me”. This time it did, I was not careless. I do not take risks while driving. The accident has left a strong impression on me. The deep realization that I could not have done anything to prevent the accident shocked my system.

It took three or four days before I could crawl to the toilet by myself, a few months before I could walk normally and half a year and two surgeries before I could run again. That was a tough time for me. From a life filled with sport and exercise to not able to do anything was not good for my head. But it gave me space to think about my life, what is really important and it gave me courage to make other choices. I had made a decision: I was going to explore the world.

I always had the desire to travel, explore the world and experience adventures. During my studies, I could get an internship in South Africa. My parents strongly opposed, and I obeyed. Later there was an internship opportunity in the United States, but at the last moment it was canceled. Immediately after the completion of my education I was offered a very nice job and I took it. I met my girlfriend, we got married and we bought a house. It just did not happen. But now it will…

My first travel
My first trip of 6 months was to Central America. The experience there was more or less an extension of my experience of my accident. After Hurricane Mitch, Honduras was destroyed to a large extent. Many people had nothing, but life went on as usual, with misery and with pleasure. The people there seemed to be even happier than most people here in the “rich “west, especially in small but important things in life.

Now, I am sometimes bewildered what some people worry about. Endless discussions about which car they are going to get, which color and which options it should have. Promotion at work: we run to the bank to see how much more we can borrow, for whom and for what? Sometimes I just do not get it, though I did the same before. We often look forward to plan our lives and then worry if your plans can or will be realized. We often look back at the choices we have made and sometimes we condemn them. Wrongly so, because we did not have the experience nor information we had at the time when we made the choice. Although it is sometimes difficult and hard, I try not to do that anymore. I want to live my life as Jason Mraz once sang: “To win some or learn some”.

The time after the accident, I was definitely not happy. But now when I look at back, I think it has given me the space and courage to follow my heart. I became less materialistic and I make choices easier than before the accident. I learned to be more honest with myself … and with others. It has helped me to pursue the only thing that is important in life: to be happy.

Maybe the accident was the derailment or the liberation of my life. Derailment because I, more or less, parted with the traditional way of life that was handed to me by my environment (including my parents) in a package of expectations. Liberation because I now can follow my heart more easily.

One thing I know for sure: maybe the accident was the best thing that ever happened to me.